10 easy ways: How to spot toxic friends

Have you been left considering if one of your friends is actually a real friend? Friends should be the ones you turn to for fun times, support and love. It can be really easy to get caught up in a toxic friendship and not even know it. Here are 10 easy ways: How to spot toxic friends.

You dread spending time with them
A toxic friend will make you feel negative, unhappy and bad about yourself, which in turn makes you dread spending time with them. Sometimes toxic friends are so clever with their behaviour that you can’t identify why you don’t enjoy spending time with them but you feel uncomfortable about it. Always listen to what your gut instinct is trying to tell you.

They love drama
A toxic friend loves drama and if they haven’t got any they will go make some. If after a friend meetup your friend leaves you feeling exhausted and negative, it is time to spend your time and energy with a real friend who brings positive vibes. Misery loves company and no one’s got time for that.

They encourage comparison
If you have good news a toxic friend will always have to better it. This can be exhausting, frustrating and leave you feeling like you’re not good enough.

They’re resentful of your success
Toxic friends can’t be happy for you. They will want you to do well but not better than them. They will actively stop you from reaching your full potential by telling you it’s not possible, by making you doubt yourself and by putting your down.

They are never interested in you and your life
A toxic friend loves to talk about themselves so much that they hardly let you get a word in. When you do, they act uninterested.

They pick on your weaknesses

Also known as a form of bullying, they will make sly, passing comments on things they know are your weak spots. They will bring up things you have discussed before or disguise nasty comments as jokes to make themselves feel superior.

They are inconsistent
Toxic friends keep you guessing. They will cause rifts, they will cancel plans and they will make you feel on edge with their mood. They also lack commitment to their friends and it will feel one-sided. Is your friend too opinionated?

They are selfish
Toxic friends lack generosity and will think of themselves before you. Time spent with them will be centred around them, their life and their drama.

You have to be careful what you tell them
If you have a friend and you have to be careful what you tell them, they are a toxic friend. If they make you feel too uncomfortable, embarrassed or worried to share things with them, they are definitely not a real friend. If they share your secrets and love to gossip that is not a person you want in your life either.

They are controlling
Toxic friends will try to control you and your life. This is why they show many of the traits listed above. They will show inconsistency in behaviour such as acting needy one minute and acting really distant the next. This is controlling behaviour to keep you guessing and to make you feel like you need them.


There is a reason you are reading this. If your friend shows any of the above signs and they make you feel unhappy it may be time to detox them and make new friends. Outgrowing friends and detoxing friends is all a normal part of life. Friendships should be real and rewarding for everyone. They should be based on mutual effort, positivity and happiness. If a friend makes you feel negative, you need to be brave enough to do something about it. Here is how a strong woman says goodbye and moves on. Break-ups with friends are never nice, but you will feel an instant weight lift from your shoulder when you do and question why you didn’t do it sooner.

Author: Gemma Scopes

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