We are human, we make mistakes, we mess up and a real friend will both apologise and accept apologies to make their friendship stronger. An apology is one of the first things you learn as a child. It makes a wrong a right, saves your toys from getting taken away and or prevents time out. The magic word ‘sorry’ when you’re a child gets you prevention and forgiveness. But as an adult an apology turns into you get older you apologise to give and to repair. This apology development is up to you to learn, create and use. It is a secret weapon to repairing friendships. We have a natural instinct for long term relationship and sometimes apologies need to be made to keep it thriving.
How to apologise to my best friend…
- Step 1: Acknowledgement
The acknowledgement is not about you. It is about you showing that you understand what the other person has been upset by.
E.g. ‘I know you’re upset because…’
- Step 2: Expression of remorse and empathy
Remorse it truly feeling bad for what you have done and empathy really understands emotional how the other person is feeling.
E.g. ‘I don’t blame you for feeling the way you do, I would feel the same way’
- Step 3: Restitution
Negotiate a fair restitution to solve the problem including you going above and beyond to rebuild trust. For an apology to be effective it should be as soon as possible. With these three steps you will be empowered to repair relationships that matter to you.
E.g. ‘I would love to make this up to you. I really value you our friendship. I am going to… (give you something extra special to show you just how much you mean to me).