What not to say to your single friends

What not to say to your single friends

My life path lead me to experience being single in my late twenties and it opened up a whole other world to experience. No one was aware of what not to say to your single friends. I’ve always been in tune with the universe, I practice self-love and I was confident I would meet someone again. The problem was the people around me weren’t convinced. Being single lead to a bombardment of comments from family and ‘friends’ that were hurtful, shocking and would ruin my vibe for days. It is important for those of you that find yourself single, for whatever reason, maybe you haven’t found the right one, you got divorced, maybe even your a single mum too, that your life from now on should only be defined by you.

If your friend recently became single and that’s why you’re reading this, I take my hat off to you. On behalf of your single friend thank you so much for taking the time to consider how to be sensitive but realistic and not make your single friend feel like shit. You are a great friend! 



What not to say to your single friends…

Mention the ex

Just don’t go there. If your single friend wishes to talk about their ex, they should be the one to choose when and the context of the conversation.   

Say good things about the ex

Hell NO! There’s a time and a place. Don’t mention you’ve seen them and they’re looking great, lost weight etc. The last thing your single friend needs to hear when they are improving themselves is that the ex is too.

Mention anything to do with the ex moving on

If you see the ex has been tagged in something on Facebook, out with someone else, in another relationship – just don’t mention it! Your single friend will already be desperately trying to better themselves in any way possible and they do not need to hear that they have fierce competition from their ex. 

Show sympathy when telling your own good news

Your single friend still loves to hear your happy news. Whether you’re engaged, buying a new house, pregnant, got a promotion whatever it is. They are single, they are not bitter at rest of the world.

Mention online dating

You don’t need to be forcing your single friend into moving on. Let them take their time, handle the situation how they want to and love their own company. This makes them feel like they should be moving on when actually they may not be ready. Online dating isn’t the only place to meet someone and shouldn’t be treated as a way to meet someone fast because you don’t believe your single friend will find someone in real life.

Mention your single friends age, that they’re ‘getting on’ 

I can’t believe I even have to write this one but I’ve experienced it! Think before you speak. Your single friend is well aware of their age, life situation, plan and dreams. They know what they want, so leave them to it. The last thing they need is you adding pressure.

Ask if they’re looking for someone

If you’re single friend desires to be in a relationship of course they are ‘looking’, but what do you even mean by that? It’s not as if they can flick a switch when they’re ready and all eligible potential partners step forwards. You do not need to have an input on your single friend finding someone else especially after a recent breakup.  

Are you single? Leave in the comments what things people have said to you that are really annoying! 

Author: The Friend Coach

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